how am i gonna cope this? should i just go away and disappeared from the face of the earth to forgive and forget. it's not easy to forgive isn't it? was it the curse of having such a delicate feelings? don't ppl see the signs i've put up, those colors i choose to wear? i guess i would never have a normal relationship with others if i haven't 'cure' this sit. me and n sort of discussed slightly, she don't know what to do either.
oh well, like it or not i gotta straigthen up fast, cos i'm chasing something... it's really funny, cos a part of me want to relax, but a part of me wants to rush things to get that thing... the result of this constant battle : ANGER. SADNESS. HATRED. and i can't expect anyone to understand, but i do wanted to hear some soothing (perhaps a bit of a bulls) words.
i do realise that i've been deniying myself, i can do more than this, and i am destined to do something BIG. i've been throwing excuses to my mentors to explain my bad performance and my low expectancy...
i am destined for something BIG and i can sensed it. and i do wanna change, i do wanna get rid of this uncomfortable feelings... but i don't know where to start?