can't stop whining...

it's been a long time since my last blog, i've been busy... ada banyak hal yg pining gue ceritain. pertama, all this time my i've been having trouble in the study departement, my parents keep saying don't give up, they think i'm giving up my study, but the truth is the other way around. my problem is i'm not giving up, it seems that i dunno when to give up and move on and when to keep trying, because i nearly there... my bad highschool experience keep haunting me, i can't get it off my head, no matter what i tried to do. i never thought 1 failure could do this much damage. i've lost my self confindece...
yg kedua, hari ini gue buka2 friendster...surprisingly gue ketemu teman2 sd gue...huhuhuhu mukanya berubah semua, udah pada dewasa bgt, sementara muka gue masih tetep terlihat culun. not just their face changes that i've notice, but they also put their pics with their bf. they look great together, their not the cutest couples but it seems that they fit each other perfectly. meanwhile i'm still on my own as always. what happend to ian you asked? i dunno? i guess he lost interest in me. anyway, i don't have a picture of me stading beside a man in my head. or have i completely lost my confidence of finding that 'someone'? even my little sis has one. hmmm... -_-

run little miss K, run...

it's been almost a month that K hide herself in her tiny apartemen. she doesn't want to see anyone, except her auntie. she didn't speak to anyone in class... and surprisingly no one care to asked what's going on? or what's wrong? i tried to asked but, she just smiled and said, 'oh.. nothing.. just lack of sleep i guess.' i knew that she lied, but why? i haven't seen her smiled in a while, she keeps avoiding people, but why?
me and K is not a closed friend, but it doesn't take a genious to know something's wrong with her. i just wish i can help her... it seem like she doen't not know how to trust again...

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hari ini rasanya pusing sekali... gue tdk bisa membawa diri, rasanya pingin ngumpet di ujung dunia... masih kesel, knp org2 egois semua, why can't they just leave me alone... giliran gue udah reda amarahnya selalu saja ada yg membuat gue kembalii marah2 sebal... lagi sedang tidak bisa mengendalikan emosi...