x : so val, apakah project itu berhasil?
v : aku rasa tidak -_- tapi memang dari awal aku sdh berniat utk pergi ke kota itu, setidaknya disana aku bisa memulai sesuatu yg baru...

monday blues

it was a pleasant sunday, i had funch (fun brunch.red) with my family, it's my aunt's birthday.

but it was a lousy monday, i woke up had an argument with my mom. dressed up for work, fully prepared with nano ipod you gave me, my pink 'grandma' cardigan and that blue blanket. from where i sit in is very cold, so that's why i brought reinforcement. hour went by, 1st bad new, i had to changed supplier, 2nd totally using another person's design (which is very bad for my soul), 3rd i found out the awful truth about one of my friend (it seems that my mates know about it but hadn't found the right time to tell me), 4th visa process hasn't been going very smoothly... so i had another argument with my mom.

oh well, i guess i just spend tonight watching house md. at least we have something in common.

mr. blue

Mr. Blue,
I told you that I love you
Please believe me

Mr. Blue,
I have to go now, darling
Don't be angry

I know that you're tired
Know that you're sore and sick and sad for some reason
So I leave you with a smile
Kiss you on the cheek
and you will call it treason

mr. blue - catherine feeny

an afternoon tea with mr. t

i know i should be working... it's still office hours afterall... instead i was having an afternoon tea with mr. t

well, not literally since we're not in even in the same island. but it felt like the good old days where we were still 2 art students sitting in front of QCA gallery and talking non stop about everything. i see him as talented young designer.. but even he struggles in his own city. i said, same here... and i told him what happened last saturday. then we talked quite a bit about it, it was a relieved for me, we have a same vision, same taste in design, same work ethic and yes of course same mischief minds and ideas...

v : t, u should put more stickers and take more pictures..
t : can't do, it's considered as vandalism here. beside i got no one, it usually a one man show. me doing all the stickers, and put it places, and being chased by the police, don't have time for taking pictures.
v : uh.. i would go with you, if..
t : yeah i know we're not in bne anymore val... it would be nice if you tagged along and documented it... let me know when u're coming to bangkok... by then i should have another project ready to displayed...

detik ini.

hari ini melelahkan, lelah krn tertawa, lelah menangkis smua ucapan2 tdk benar, lelah menangkis dan menyangkal perasaan ku sendiri, lelah karena aku terlalu banyak berpikir, memikiran apa yg telah ku lakukan, lelah memikirkan apa yg harus aku lakukan setelah ini, lelah memikirkan masa depanku, aku lelah berlari lelah pokoknya lelah...

the weekenders

crazy weekend, lack of sleep, anxiously waiting to make my life back on track.. and there's only one song that keeps playing over and over in my head..

everybody wants to be a winner
everybody has a dream
we all need a shinin' star when things ain't what they seem
so tonight we're gonna wish upon a star
we never wished upon before ....

(bryan adams - star)

x : so val should we go and look for one?
v : but it's raining outside..
x : then we go and look for it tomorrow...

secret note #52

if only the world is simple and i could just pour my heart out, i would.

strangely fiction

let me tell you about a dream i had a couple of days ago. i dreamt that i woke up at 11.30am, and i panicked.. i'm late, what excuse should i give to my boss. then... i looked around, i realized that i wasn't in my room, it had queen sized bed, the wall was pastel lime and it had tall windows, simplistic. i did not dare to look at the photographs by the bedside table, too affraid i guess.

i wonder, who's room was it?

secret note #51

she'll laugh even louder when she's sad

it's definitely blue and gray

to be honest, i'm still a bit blue about last saturday. but he's right everything does fall into pieces, every bits and pieces of the puzzle have come together and now i can finally see the big picture.

it seems to me that i will follow his footsteps.. and someone else has followed my footsteps. oh well.. i'm utterly confused... don't you?

you will always be my mystery man

it's sunday, but i manage to get hold of m and asked her to meet up for a bit of chat. as we finished talking and pouring our hearts out... our eyes kinda stare at this guy who somehow seems familiar..

m : val, isn't that E?
v : yeah, it's him, gosh.. he hasn't changed a bit..
m : so aren't you gonna say hi to him?
v : nope
m : why not?
v : he left without saying goodbye... besides, it's been ages, i'm sure he doesn't even remember me...

then we went home

dusty old ewok

well... this is the 3rd weekend in a row that i spend my saturdays working, minimum wage and overtime. 1st and 2nd week was ok, at least i went home with good news, but yesterday was... i dunno, couldn't described it. i was having fun with onisan and his gank, i spend my day laughing, eating, and of course working. but as i went home and sat on a sofa...

x : so how did it go?
v : i didn't get the job, mine was awfull.
x : i'm sure it's not that bad, u did great. i've seen it..v.. what's wrong
v : can i just hug you and not say a word...
we were inaudible for a moment i cried .. then..
x : it's ok, i guess now u know for certain that you make the right decission :)

mr. postman and my secret santa

it was raining all day in southern jakarta, but somehow this envelope manage to find its way to my house. it's a bit damped though... but that doesn't stop my sister's curiosity...


r : so did you get in?
v : no, i haven't even applied yet?
r : did you get in?
v : no, i haven't submit anything
r : so, what's that letter's for?

apearently it's just a notification that there will be an info session on the 24th. and i finally get the hold of my cousin, he's been busy lately, but he promise to help me to book the ticket. also to my surprise he still remembers the game we always play at christmas >_<.

it's nearly the end of the year again... and yes i've got no plans for new year's eve. and i haven't really write much after mr. a told me not to pour my heart out on a pixelated web page.