it's quite dark even though the sun shines very brightly outside...
it got clouds on it's ceiling to provoke it's inhabitant's imagination...
it full of books mostly with pictures in them and great stories were told by those books too...
it has a wardrobe with only one door left hanging and the other one, leaning against it..
the day is getting late perhaps it was time... i guess it is time, time to say good bye to all these. it's been a great years spent together...
i'll cut my hair, buy a new blue cocoon and of course finished all of those unfinished businesses... then off i'll go... but perhaps, this creepy blue room with clouds on it's ceiling will always be my sanctuary, as valcory will always be inside me...
27.5.08
23.5.08
secret note #24
it might only be a moment when our lives collided...
...but when it comes to friend, trust your first instinct
...but when it comes to friend, trust your first instinct
18.5.08
aku dan mr. R
"kanin.. mr. R mana? apa kabarnya dia?"
namaku kanin, kadang dipanggil ewok atau emak. dan hampir semua orang yg aku kenal, juga kenal dengan mr.R itu...
tadi pagi aku terbangun dng wajahnya di sampingku, wajah si mr.R yg tersohor itu, lalu aku sadar... kalau aku masih bermimpi. belakangan ini, setidaknya sebulan sekali, mr. R ini selalu hadir di mimpiku, entah saat aku sdg bersama si tante amerika, atau saat aku sdg menghadiri sebuah pameran seni, dia ada dtg secara tiba2 mengandeng tanganku dan berkata, "kita harus bicara.." tapi pagi hari ini berbeda, dia ada disampingku, dan saat ku membuka mata dia tersenyum dan berkata sesuatu, sesuatu hal yang tentu saja tak dapat ku mengerti krn smua ini hanyalah sebuah mimpi, tetapi dia tetap berbicara dng sangat anthusias, menjelaskan sesuatu padaku.
sebenarnya hubungan kami singkat, sangat singkat, tetapi entah kenapa bagi teman2ku mr. R ini tetap pasanganku, atau setidaknya kalau salah satu dari mereka ingin mencari mr.R, akulah yg pertama mereka hubungi. sudah berkali2 pula aku katakan, aku tak tau dia ada dimana, sedang sibuk apa, no hp, alamat e-mail, bahkan profile di fs pun sdh aku hapus. aku tau itu kebiasaan buruk... aku melakukan itu karena aku sebenarnya sdh tdk mau tau lagi apa2 ttg mr. R. dia telah menyakiti aku, dia meninggalkan ku utk wanita lain. tapi tentu saja aku tak pernah mengatakan hal ini kepada teman2ku yg jg teman2nya...
"eh kanin, salam ya buat mr. R. gue sebenarnya bener2 penasaran nih ama kabarnya.. udh lama bgt nggak ketemu..."
aku hanya tersenyum, mungkin sebenarnya aku jg ingin tau keadaannya...
namaku kanin, kadang dipanggil ewok atau emak. dan hampir semua orang yg aku kenal, juga kenal dengan mr.R itu...
tadi pagi aku terbangun dng wajahnya di sampingku, wajah si mr.R yg tersohor itu, lalu aku sadar... kalau aku masih bermimpi. belakangan ini, setidaknya sebulan sekali, mr. R ini selalu hadir di mimpiku, entah saat aku sdg bersama si tante amerika, atau saat aku sdg menghadiri sebuah pameran seni, dia ada dtg secara tiba2 mengandeng tanganku dan berkata, "kita harus bicara.." tapi pagi hari ini berbeda, dia ada disampingku, dan saat ku membuka mata dia tersenyum dan berkata sesuatu, sesuatu hal yang tentu saja tak dapat ku mengerti krn smua ini hanyalah sebuah mimpi, tetapi dia tetap berbicara dng sangat anthusias, menjelaskan sesuatu padaku.
sebenarnya hubungan kami singkat, sangat singkat, tetapi entah kenapa bagi teman2ku mr. R ini tetap pasanganku, atau setidaknya kalau salah satu dari mereka ingin mencari mr.R, akulah yg pertama mereka hubungi. sudah berkali2 pula aku katakan, aku tak tau dia ada dimana, sedang sibuk apa, no hp, alamat e-mail, bahkan profile di fs pun sdh aku hapus. aku tau itu kebiasaan buruk... aku melakukan itu karena aku sebenarnya sdh tdk mau tau lagi apa2 ttg mr. R. dia telah menyakiti aku, dia meninggalkan ku utk wanita lain. tapi tentu saja aku tak pernah mengatakan hal ini kepada teman2ku yg jg teman2nya...
"eh kanin, salam ya buat mr. R. gue sebenarnya bener2 penasaran nih ama kabarnya.. udh lama bgt nggak ketemu..."
aku hanya tersenyum, mungkin sebenarnya aku jg ingin tau keadaannya...
14.5.08
13.5.08
driving with miss frog
the wedding isn't that bad after all, but the morning after felt like a hang over...
got a headache, stomache, and nose-ache (i mean i got flu)...
i was supposed to do something today, but i completely forgot -_-, so i went for a drive with miss frog, believe me, i'm better off driving big cars, but seems that miss frog is the only thing i'm allowed to drive beside the ones in wii, she doesn't completely understands me, always went completely the opposite of where i wanted to go. and she didn't tell it like it is...
miss frog was broken when she was given to me (well, she was given to my mother to be exact), but i'm sure she'll be just fine with me (or maybe she will get worse.red)..
she was broken, but i think i'm going to love her as she is ^^, welcome to my world miss frog...
got a headache, stomache, and nose-ache (i mean i got flu)...
i was supposed to do something today, but i completely forgot -_-, so i went for a drive with miss frog, believe me, i'm better off driving big cars, but seems that miss frog is the only thing i'm allowed to drive beside the ones in wii, she doesn't completely understands me, always went completely the opposite of where i wanted to go. and she didn't tell it like it is...
miss frog was broken when she was given to me (well, she was given to my mother to be exact), but i'm sure she'll be just fine with me (or maybe she will get worse.red)..
she was broken, but i think i'm going to love her as she is ^^, welcome to my world miss frog...
9.5.08
feels like a babble
well, it's this time of the year anyway, where you'll start recieving wedding invites... i do too, at it feels odd, instead of my parents name on it, it got mine,
Valcory W
Bla bla bla st, JKT.
my cousin's getting married this weekend, next week's my friend, and then my best friend's by the end of this year. but don't even try to asked when's my turn...
by the time i was 12 when some of my friends have their 1st love, i said, "i don't think i want to get married."(well, i did have a huge crush on someone back then, i still do maybe until now xp) at middle school, i was too busy planning the next mischivous things, and off course studying hard so i can get a scholarship to that hip and cool girls school. i did get acceptance at that girls school but i gave up my place to my friend, (and i'm glad i did that) i went to this semi international school instead. highschool wasn't as great as i thought, you know everyone, and everyone know you, but somehow it felt lonely. so then again i focused on doing my research in the lab. i'm not that smart, it just that it's cool, the ac always on ehehe ^^. had a relationship but fails to maintain... i had fun though, learn a lot from him too. then i went to college ^^. college was fun, stressfull but fun. meet someone, who seems like he's the perfect guy to bring home to meet your parents, but.. well he's not what he seems to be.
working life... stressfull, but i meet nice and cool ppl ^^. had a crush on someone too ^^, he's perfect. but i chose the other guy, who's totally the opposite, he's different in any sort of ways you could imagine.. at 1st i was just trying to be his friend, he seems to have none when we met. i thought there's something between us but we are too different, and he's in love with someone else, i'm just the rebound. and all he said (now) seems to be a lie, there was no something, for him this was all just a game, to keep him amused, just a temporary state-like a commercial break in a superbowl game...
now, when i look at my cousin, i'm glad all that's is over, i don't want to be in her shoes, if the thing that i had went on, i will be blinded with that so called love and make my family suffers. i am catholic, we are pretty moderate in terms of breaking rules for certain circumstances, but for mariage, the church are very strict. but i'm not against it, i'm just merely trying to avoid being in the same situation...
miss p onced told me, that she doesn't want to get married, she just need a best friend to stay by her side for the rest of her life.. maybe she's right... maybe that's what i need too, i'm untill now still don't know what to say, if ppl asked me when.. i usually said,"later, i still want to travel.. or i want to work overseas.. or i want to get my master degree 1st.. " but honestly i don't know if i want to get married. but miss p is right though, i do need a friend to accompanied me for the rest of my life...
Valcory W
Bla bla bla st, JKT.
my cousin's getting married this weekend, next week's my friend, and then my best friend's by the end of this year. but don't even try to asked when's my turn...
by the time i was 12 when some of my friends have their 1st love, i said, "i don't think i want to get married."(well, i did have a huge crush on someone back then, i still do maybe until now xp) at middle school, i was too busy planning the next mischivous things, and off course studying hard so i can get a scholarship to that hip and cool girls school. i did get acceptance at that girls school but i gave up my place to my friend, (and i'm glad i did that) i went to this semi international school instead. highschool wasn't as great as i thought, you know everyone, and everyone know you, but somehow it felt lonely. so then again i focused on doing my research in the lab. i'm not that smart, it just that it's cool, the ac always on ehehe ^^. had a relationship but fails to maintain... i had fun though, learn a lot from him too. then i went to college ^^. college was fun, stressfull but fun. meet someone, who seems like he's the perfect guy to bring home to meet your parents, but.. well he's not what he seems to be.
working life... stressfull, but i meet nice and cool ppl ^^. had a crush on someone too ^^, he's perfect. but i chose the other guy, who's totally the opposite, he's different in any sort of ways you could imagine.. at 1st i was just trying to be his friend, he seems to have none when we met. i thought there's something between us but we are too different, and he's in love with someone else, i'm just the rebound. and all he said (now) seems to be a lie, there was no something, for him this was all just a game, to keep him amused, just a temporary state-like a commercial break in a superbowl game...
now, when i look at my cousin, i'm glad all that's is over, i don't want to be in her shoes, if the thing that i had went on, i will be blinded with that so called love and make my family suffers. i am catholic, we are pretty moderate in terms of breaking rules for certain circumstances, but for mariage, the church are very strict. but i'm not against it, i'm just merely trying to avoid being in the same situation...
miss p onced told me, that she doesn't want to get married, she just need a best friend to stay by her side for the rest of her life.. maybe she's right... maybe that's what i need too, i'm untill now still don't know what to say, if ppl asked me when.. i usually said,"later, i still want to travel.. or i want to work overseas.. or i want to get my master degree 1st.. " but honestly i don't know if i want to get married. but miss p is right though, i do need a friend to accompanied me for the rest of my life...
7.5.08
in between...
i am currently standing in between homework and nintendo wii,
i am in between two cities,
i am in between my past and my future,
i am in between my dream job/career and everyone else's dream to have a normal life
i am in between courage to take risk and persisting in the comfort of the present
i am in between . . .
i am in between two cities,
i am in between my past and my future,
i am in between my dream job/career and everyone else's dream to have a normal life
i am in between courage to take risk and persisting in the comfort of the present
i am in between . . .
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